October 14, 2008
How Not To Start the Week
Y'know, this getting old business sucks pond water. Really. I'm not even sick and this year's checkup and testing has been far more trouble than the end result of "oh, you're okay" seems to warrant. Sheesh.
The rest below the fold for those totally not interested or those who prefer to skip any mention of medical tests.
Today, oh joy of joys, it was that lovely test - the colonoscopy (BTW - microsoft's spell check has not heard of this word and has the idea that I really meant to write "colonize" instead - heh).
If you've never had one and you're heading toward 50 - just think of what you have to look forward to. It's enough to put one off of going to the doctor all together.
Yesterday was clear liquid day all day. Now, I don't eat a lot of food all at one time, generally I "graze" during the day. My job allows me to do this because I work at home - I can take a break from the computer, run upstairs, and grab a little something. This means, every time I headed to the kitchen to get yet another glass of something to drink, I'd nearly forget and open the cabinet to grab some crackers.
I ended up drinking gallons of fluid... juice, tea, soda (although I almost never drink soda anymore), broth, tea, water, water, and more water. None of it filled me up. Not even close.
Of course there were the pills - which I insisted on even thought the office girl was quite equally insistent that the "liquid is very nice". Ugh! (it reminded me of the scene in the Hitchhikers Guide book where Zaphod gets in the elevator and wants to go up - the elevator knows there is trouble upstairs and keeps saying "down is nice too") It turns out office chick needed to find a different instruction sheet if I wanted to use the pills... *sigh*
Anyhow, pills it was and a less than comfortable evening ensued. Ho-hum.
This morning it was off to the hospital for the test. My husband had to drive me of course (they don't let you drive). I ended up having to wait and wait - there's a shock - because down the hall from me they had some poor sod with bad veins and no one could get an IV started on him/her. I used to be pretty good at it and damn near walked down there to tell them to let me try it so we could get a move on.
Eventually, they got me in.
Up to now, everyone I've talked to about this has said - the test is the easy part - you'll sleep through it all and "boom" they're done.
HA! HA - I say!
What they do is "inflate" the bowel with gas so they can look at the walls properly. I guess they said since my colon is apparently in a more... um... tightly packed area than most people. They had a more difficult time inflating it. I distinctly remember telling them - "OW - Hey that hurts!" More than once.
They gave me more meds - and finished up. All is clear. I'm home and sitting here working. (one hopes I don't do some idiotic things in my supposedly half drugged state). Other than being tired I feel okay. I even got to eat finally. (thank heaven!).
The nurse said people aren't usually hungry afterward even if they are before... apparently she has not had many people like me. I had my little muffin and a coke which they provided and both of which were duly wolfed down in about 2 seconds. Then got the hell out of there - I even took the stairs rather than wait for the elevator... directly to Starbucks for a soy mocha and home to a nice pork chop left over from 2 nights ago.
I will have to strongly consider whether I want to go through this again in 10 years. Good grief! I am NOT a person who does fasting well - at all. I don't see a point when there's no family history and nothing even vaguely pointing to a problem.
There is such a thing as "overkill" on preventative tests.
Oh and my last thought is... I know there are people who go through this process ("colon cleansing" as it's advertised on television) in order to lose weight or supposedly improve their health. To you I say "You are INSANE" - yes and I stand by that.
The rest below the fold for those totally not interested or those who prefer to skip any mention of medical tests.
Today, oh joy of joys, it was that lovely test - the colonoscopy (BTW - microsoft's spell check has not heard of this word and has the idea that I really meant to write "colonize" instead - heh).
If you've never had one and you're heading toward 50 - just think of what you have to look forward to. It's enough to put one off of going to the doctor all together.
Yesterday was clear liquid day all day. Now, I don't eat a lot of food all at one time, generally I "graze" during the day. My job allows me to do this because I work at home - I can take a break from the computer, run upstairs, and grab a little something. This means, every time I headed to the kitchen to get yet another glass of something to drink, I'd nearly forget and open the cabinet to grab some crackers.
I ended up drinking gallons of fluid... juice, tea, soda (although I almost never drink soda anymore), broth, tea, water, water, and more water. None of it filled me up. Not even close.
Of course there were the pills - which I insisted on even thought the office girl was quite equally insistent that the "liquid is very nice". Ugh! (it reminded me of the scene in the Hitchhikers Guide book where Zaphod gets in the elevator and wants to go up - the elevator knows there is trouble upstairs and keeps saying "down is nice too") It turns out office chick needed to find a different instruction sheet if I wanted to use the pills... *sigh*
Anyhow, pills it was and a less than comfortable evening ensued. Ho-hum.
This morning it was off to the hospital for the test. My husband had to drive me of course (they don't let you drive). I ended up having to wait and wait - there's a shock - because down the hall from me they had some poor sod with bad veins and no one could get an IV started on him/her. I used to be pretty good at it and damn near walked down there to tell them to let me try it so we could get a move on.
Eventually, they got me in.
Up to now, everyone I've talked to about this has said - the test is the easy part - you'll sleep through it all and "boom" they're done.
HA! HA - I say!
What they do is "inflate" the bowel with gas so they can look at the walls properly. I guess they said since my colon is apparently in a more... um... tightly packed area than most people. They had a more difficult time inflating it. I distinctly remember telling them - "OW - Hey that hurts!" More than once.
They gave me more meds - and finished up. All is clear. I'm home and sitting here working. (one hopes I don't do some idiotic things in my supposedly half drugged state). Other than being tired I feel okay. I even got to eat finally. (thank heaven!).
The nurse said people aren't usually hungry afterward even if they are before... apparently she has not had many people like me. I had my little muffin and a coke which they provided and both of which were duly wolfed down in about 2 seconds. Then got the hell out of there - I even took the stairs rather than wait for the elevator... directly to Starbucks for a soy mocha and home to a nice pork chop left over from 2 nights ago.
I will have to strongly consider whether I want to go through this again in 10 years. Good grief! I am NOT a person who does fasting well - at all. I don't see a point when there's no family history and nothing even vaguely pointing to a problem.
There is such a thing as "overkill" on preventative tests.
Oh and my last thought is... I know there are people who go through this process ("colon cleansing" as it's advertised on television) in order to lose weight or supposedly improve their health. To you I say "You are INSANE" - yes and I stand by that.
Posted by: Teresa in
Medical
at
03:33 PM
| Comments (6)
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Post contains 769 words, total size 4 kb.
1
Oh, dear. T -- you have the worst luck when it comes to the health care and travel industries. Remind me to stay away from all hospitals and airports when you are in the same state. Gentle ((HUGS)) and many virtual lattes your way! Ciao!
Posted by: Joey at October 14, 2008 03:46 PM (10jmQ)
2
After seeing what my mom had to endure with the liquid - you're smart to go with the pill. Since I'm in denial that I'm even in the brink of my 40-teens (you really think I'm gonna admit to Gawd and everyone I'm almost 50 - HA!), I have no doubt that's the route I'll choose as well.
Posted by: Mirmie at October 14, 2008 04:31 PM (swoBe)
3
Arthur has colonoscopies on a regular basis... since they found more polyps last year he gets another one next month. He drinks the liquid and it's all become old hat to him but there is NO WAY I'm doing that; sorry.
Nope.
Glad it's over - for you, at least!
Nope.
Glad it's over - for you, at least!
Posted by: pam at October 14, 2008 05:30 PM (l6NIn)
4
One word: Oy. I have another 18 years to go yet. I hope they knock me out completely and I don't wake up until two days later.
It's good you got it out of the way. Better to err on the side of caution, I say.
Posted by: Erica at October 14, 2008 07:50 PM (QvlE2)
5
Huh.... I'm a bit older than you and my doctor has yet to suggest I have such fun. I wonder what else he's holding back from me?
I intend to march in there tomorrow and ask very accusingly "Why do you like Teresa better than me?"
No I don't.
But you have my mucho sympathies, you and your tush.
I intend to march in there tomorrow and ask very accusingly "Why do you like Teresa better than me?"
No I don't.
But you have my mucho sympathies, you and your tush.
Posted by: LeeAnn at October 14, 2008 08:05 PM (ayhdB)
6
OK. You need to google Dave Barry and the colossal colon or... wait... http://www.miamiherald.com/548/story/427603.html
Read that.
Posted by: Bou at October 15, 2008 09:36 PM (PyX9Z)
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